They told me I couldn’t.

Growing up I heard those words over and over in many different forms.

“You can’t play on the boys golf team. You are a girl!”

“You can’t go play two hand touch football with the neighborhood kids! You are supposed to play with Barbie and play dress up with the girls.”

“You can’t go to prom with your girlfriend. You are supposed to date boys.”

“You can’t get into that college!”

“You should be wearing lipstick and makeup and why are you always wearing a ponytail? Put your hair down!”

“You aren’t good enough to do that!”

“You can’t marry her.”

“Moving across the country? Why would you do that? You have family and friends here. You already have a good job.”

“That’s not the right path to take. You should go down that path over there.”

Here is the thing: I am very competitive. When someone or a system or a general expectation from society tells me that I can not, my response is, “challenge accepted.” When someone doubts me, my ability, or my potential, it is painful. Then it gives me the fire, the drive and the passion to prove them wrong.

Go ahead, tell me I can’t. I will show you that I can.

I played on the boys golf team for 6 years. I played football and basketball and dug in the dirt at the end of the cul de sac. I went to prom with a group of friends and met up with my girlfriend afterwards. I got into that college and then was employed there for 5 years. I do what I want with my hair- up or down and don’t even own lipstick. I am good enough. I did marry her. I moved 2700 miles away from my hometown to live in my dream city. I am creating my own path.

How about you? What doubt may be holding you back? Who is telling you that you can’t? What fear is standing in the way? What can you do about it?

There are two options: give up before trying or fight like hell to prove that you can. I encourage you to choose the latter.

You got this. Keep going.